THIS IS MY HAIR-STORY
That was the norm, when I was a little girl, my mother was one of those kitchen beautician. She got her beautician license and worked in a neighborhood beauty shop but mostly did friends and family in our kitchen.
After my mother washed my hair in the garage's big sink connected to the washer and dryer, she would put my hair in a million braids and send me outside to play. I grew up in San Diego where the weather is 70 degrees 80% of the year so it would dry pretty quick that way.
But as it dried my braids got tighter and tighter till I had to run inside and beg her to loosen them. Once my age hit the double digits my pleads were not only for a loosening but a reduction in the number of braids sticking out of my head.
I don't know if being that, my mother was able to do our hair herself made it easier or worse. As I kid I always had it in braids unless it was a special occasion or holiday. Special occasions were the time for special hair do's. Easter was always a good one. Any holiday that coincided with Church Sundays always got a special Do.
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| Easter Sunday 1983 |
There were other personal special days like birthdays and graduation, and of course everyone's all time favorite was PICTURE DAY!
Picture day was a nightmare, you never knew what was gonna come back 3 weeks after you took the photos.
But one year.... it happened. I was in the 6th grade and my mother did my hair for my school's picture day and she picked out a very nice "Little House on the Prairie" type dress. I sat for hours under the hair dryer and slept with my hair in rollers so my curls would be nice and tight for picture day. But 3 weeks later when the pictures came back THIS is what I looked like....
When my mother saw the photos she told me I looked like a "floozy". She called my grandmother, my aunts and uncles, the neighbors and her closets friend and talked about these photos for days. That when I knew that my hair had the "POWER" I didn't know how to use it til much later but my hair was "MAGICAL".
I must of been in high school the first time I was asked,
"Can I touch your hair?"
And, I'm sure it was nothing too crazy of a hair style. If I remember correctly it was probably one of those dry "Jheri Curls" I wanted a "Jheri Curl" because it was the latest style but I couldn't stand all of that "jheri curl" juice dripping all over everything so I kept mine dry. So basically it was an "Afro" but an 80's version.
Everyone had one, I mean all the Black people did. At least the ones in San Diego. (Unfortunately a lot in San Diegans still do...)
My point being is that it didn't look so strange or bizarre where you would have to fight the urge to touch it. It looked like this:
Goodness! Braces AND a dry Jheri Curl.... I learned, right then, my personality and charm would have to take me a LONG way!
This was nothing new, nothing strange, nothing weird or complicated. I have seen plenty of non blacks with the same type of hair as me. Well, close....Maybe this Magical Hair is not a race thing but a simple
hair thing.
I bet these guys were asked "Can I touch your hair?"
I guess the bottom line, like with most things, if you Got It ....
WORK IT!!!
I always thought my hair was not so much as a "problem child" but more of a "difficult teen", just waiting to grow up and find it's true self. By the time I got to college I started getting a real sense of self and so did my hair. College and I weren't really compatible. We hung out together for a couple of years but I felt what I needed was "off campus". So, I took my magic hair and moved on, up and out.
UN-BE-WEAVEABLE!!!!
It was the 90's and I had just discovered "the Weave". One of my girlfriends had one and I LOVED it on her. It was a deep Auburn color and she was a fair skinned very pretty black girl. (Shout out to you Deidre) At this time it was definitely a "Black Girl" thing. Non-Black women were only wearing wigs and hair pieces and mostly for stage performances or film. I remember it hurt like HELL but ooh it looked so good, once I got the hang of it. I had to tame the beast a bit first. It started off very big and wild and Chaka /Diana - like which worked for many occasions but my favorite was more of the straight Demi/Courtney Cox-like look.
You can barely tell us apart!
I always wondered how I could go to work with hair that barely grazed my shoulders and the next day have hair down my back and no one noticed. I was lucky because my best friend was a hair stylist (Shout out to my BFF Natalie) and she was good but come on ...
I knew the Black and Latina girls at Lerner's Clothing Store noticed but back then it was considered impolite to mention such things. It was rude to ask, "Is that your hair?" , "Are those your boobs?" "Did you get a nose job?" I still think it's a bit rude to ask someone such personal things but times have changed and people have no shame. There was a un -spoken code of silence as far as the "weave" went. At least among us Black Girls. We would never admit we were wearing a weave.... if asked. Now if someone in the "sista-hood" came up and said, "I love your hair, where do you get it done?" Then if you were cool, you would tell them and that would open the private conversation of "Weavology or Weavism".
My magic hair made men wild. Men, I believe, are just as obsessed by our hair as we are. It's the whole picture, the whole fantasy. My first weave I had a boyfriend so he was in on the secret but how do you manage the physicality of a relationship when "weavin it"?
Hey... What's that in your hair? Why's it so lumpy?
I took my weave to as far and back as I could. We traveled the world together. It wasn't easy finding products in other countries. Overseas weave maintenance is very difficult, let me tell you.
..... if Weaves could talk!!
My hair grew up with me....
Once Britney and Paris started getting BAD WEAVES I knew it was time to move on, up and out.
There came a time when we started to grow apart. Me and my weaves weren't seeing eye to eye. She still wanted to be CRAZY, YOUNG, and sometimes IRRESPONSIBLE.
We parted ways and I let her go. I wanted some sophistication in my life. I needed a change. I wanted to be taken a little more serious so I stripped it off to see who was behind the curtain.
I don't know if many people realize it or not but short hair is ... A LOT OF WORK. I had to keep my relaxer updated on a regular. Not to mention, my kitchen (if you don't know what a kitchen is watch the Grey's Anatomy Season 8 episode 16. Bailey tells Derek to do his baby's hair ) my kitchen needed a touch -up weekly.
I don't think I was quite ready to take on such responsibility and sophistication that comes with short and sassy. She wasn't enough fun for me. Plus I needed to shake things up for myself. I missed the "wild side" of myself. Time to do something drastic and dramatic. Just when you think you know me..... Time to keep it real.... Time to go .....
NATURAL
Going natural I thought was gonna be huge. I thought it was gonna be some big REVOLUTION. But I just stopped relaxing it and let the naps lay were they lie. Apparently I had already been in this hair 14 years earlier. No wonder it felt so comfortable.
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| 1999 |
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| 1985 |
I have been relaxing my hair almost as long as I have had hair. So I was excited to literally get back to my roots. It's always a bit of a transition to go between hair styles. Nothing is worse than mid hair style but sometimes you gotta make it work.
But once I fully became one with my natural haired self I was unstoppable. We fit together like a hand in glove. I loved my natural locks. I loved changing my hair styles weekly sometimes daily.
I don't know who wore it first and you can decide who wore it better.
I definitely have a love affair with my hair but the truth is, it's just hair. It comes and goes. You can dye it or buy it. The magic is not whats on top of your head but what's in it. With a head full of weaves or shiny and bald I am and will always be MAGICAL... (this gentleman in the photo below me was just too Gorgeous not to include so I did)
And YES you can touch my hair, at least that's what .....
And YES you can touch my hair, at least that's what .....
NEENIE SAYS
